Ummm this entry is actually dedicated to Meliss aka Delvie!!!!!!!!!!! Have a really really AMAZING BIRTHDAY HON! Welcome to the club 19!!! ;)
Yeah i`ve got nothing else to say...so everyone have a peachy day!!!!

How am I feeling today?
Coming Back To Life- Pink Floyd

Will I get far in life?
Angel- Sarah McLahlan

How do my friends see me?
I`ve had the time of my life

When will I get Married?
Antigravity Love Song- Incubus

What's my theme song?
California Dreaming by Royal Gigolos

What is the story of my life?
Kek es Narancssarga- Republic....(Blue and Orange is the title in english ;))

What am I like in bed?
Sing Sing Sing- Glenn Miller Orchestra

How can I get ahead in life?
Monkey Mask- Meligrove Band

What is my best feature?
My Blue Ocean- Maroon 5

How is today going to be?
Blue bird- John Lee Hooker

What is in store for this weekend?
Its so easy- GN`R

What is my life like at the moment?
Its All Been Done- BNL

What song describes my secrets?
Used To Love Her- GNR

What is my current lover like?
Superman- Five for Fighting....HAHAHAHAH i laughed my face off at this one

What song will they play at my funeral?
Must Get Out- Maroon 5 (niceeeeee lol)

How does the world see me?
Deny- Default

Will I have a happy life?
Domination- Apocalyptica

What do my friends really think of me?
Too Little Too late- BNL

Do people secretly lust after me?
Be My Yoko Ono- BNL

What is my theme song while I walk down the street?
She Will Be Loved- Maroon 5

What song plays while I sleep?
Ten Things I Hate about you

What song plays when a cute boy/girl sees me?
I`ll Be- Edwin McCain

What is my amazing dance song?
Straight No Chaser- Jazz Ensemble

How do I relax?
Ha Itt Lennel velem- Republic ( If you`d be here with me...)

What plays when I get ready to go out on a hot date?
I Miss You- Incubus

Why am I such an idiot?!!?!
But seriously yesterday i went thru every single possible emotion/feeling there is....but mostly the bad kind.
Okay we were supposed to be cooking outside but it was raining so we did it at my friend`s house.... for starters i drank a LOT of coffee like really a lot...just cause i felt like it. Then we had food and i had way too many drinks of way too many different kind...like i had wine, wodka, this other really strong stuff, and beer to top if all off. Then we played Activity. Then we went down to this sorta fair thing we have on May 1st and i was standing with these friends of mine that included the guy i`m still fucking hopelessly for and this buddy of his....and well i was standing there and watching my friend and her bf make out for like half an hour and the two guys talk about every girl that went by and look at them and all.....it drove me insane. Like seriously insane. Honestly there is the boy i love and he knows about it and i watched him looking at other girls and i def wanted to puke or at least jump in the river and die. Anyways i went and left them there, had a beer with a friend who at least cared about me.....and then i went down to the river and cried....then they called me that they wanna go home. So i went back semi-sulking....and they were like "hope u didnt mind that we wanted to leave" so i was like no....as that wasnt my problem at all. geez.
anyways then i was in this uber bitter state when they dropped me off at my house...my parents werent home so i decided to go back down and find someone to talk to, cause i knew that otherwise in the state of uber depression that i was in....i migbt do something silly at home or at least be sulking and crying on my own and anything is better than that. So i went and found the friend i had the beer with before....he was with Chipet. Man i was so done by this time....oh wells we chatted and decided to get together once i`m done my exam and to have a nice chat the two of us...he was being really nice. Dont get this wrong...i`m not returning to my feelings for him, it was just a nice friendly gesture. Then he had to leave and there was only me and these two other sorta friends of mine. Then we went for a walk and they decided that i needed cheering up and made me get on this roller-coster...now if u remember i never get on these things cause for one thing i hate the feeling, and then it makes me VERY naseous. So i had the worst night ever cause i couldnt sleep at all, partly from the too much coffee i drank and mostly casue my tummy hurt soooooooo much and its still hurting. I havent eaten anything in like almost a day....:S
So all night i couldnt sleep so i was thinking.....man i hope none of u go thru this. Its the worst fucking thing. My tummy was hurting, i was slightly dizzy so i couldnt move and i cried and i cried and i was feeling this utter hate for everyone and everything. Now i`m just sulking i suppose. But yeah. I was the idiot for going out yesterday, i should of stayed in and studied. I should of known better than to spend the afternoon with the boy that i should be trying to forget, and shouldnt have got on that fucking roller coster. So its all my fault. And at the same time i think i`m dissapointed in ppl in general. Not you, cause well u guys are far away and didnt do anything but just i dunno. Obviously i`m in a bad mood, which can be caused by my hurting, empty tummy and/or my lack of life....but thats okay. I`ll deal with it, i just HAD to write it out of myself. guuuuuuuuuuh.
Now i`1l go and try eating some crackers or something or puke either way. Take care guys....and just be smarter than i am, k?! :)

Hey Guys!!!!!!!!!! Do you know anything about Alex?! Is she alright? She seems to have fallen off of the planet or at least my horizont...lol but seriously if u see her /talk to her, tell her i miss her???????? Thank yo.
So finally 19....meh it doesnt feel different at all. lol it was a really amazing feeling tho, cause i got emails/text messages on my phone/phone calls and such from SOOOOOOOO many ppl and it made me feel special. :)
So yeah, i kinda wanted to thank all of you guys who sent your wishes my way, for doing so....i`ll be sure to email each and every one of you back as soon as i`ll have a bit more time.. :)
I had my art exam yesterday (that is why i only updated about my bday and such today)it was uber stressful and scary...drawing for 4 hours straight. Oh wells, i`m not really hoping...if i do get in than that`ll be an uber sweet suprise! lol But now physics awaits me, so i better go and do that.
Luv you all tons and tons!

haha appearently i dont know when my bday is?!lol in my last update i said its a week from today...which is wrong cause that update was yesterday and its a week from today...oops.;)

Hey Guys!
Thanks sooo much for all the commenters, i loved all of all your comments and to be more specific:

Alaina darlin`: I wish we could go and paint the town red together as well, that`d be uber fun for sure! Mr.Munnery, wow that`d be highly akward yes, but it was nice of him...giving you a flower and all! *grins* And that sketch is amazing!!!!! You were right it did make me laugh. :)

Jill: I love you sis!

Clayur: I love you too t00bie and yes i do know that u love me! I misseh you!!! *pouts* Give me that sunshine! ;)

Meliss: Thank YOu So Much! And yeah we havent had the chance to talk in a long long while...i thought i had you added to my msn...but you are strangly never on when i`m on, which could be a result of stupid time diff. lol oh wells i`m glad you left me a comment, i constantly read your LJs and i love `em. :) And with the boy, who knows....but thanks for your advice hon!

So yeah....umm i`m feeling better. Decided to semi be more dedicated to my studying and all in all i accepted the fact that he doesnt love me right now....who knows what the future will bring, but for now i`ve got more important things that i should be concentrating my energy on. :)
I`ve got my first art exam on Saturday and i`m freaking out! aaaaaaaa!
Plus my friend`s (well i havent kept in touch with her that much, but we used to be in the same grade, and yeah i still talk to her sometime...) anyways i just found out her dad has passed away, and i wanna go to the funeral...do u think its a good idea?!

Somebody send me some sunshine plz! ;) Ummm my bday is in a week!Yay! lol not really, its gonna be just like any other day.
Anyways i should go and draw and have breaky, as its already 9:15.

Lurve You!:)

I`ve been thinking a lot lately,as well as been listening to a lot of Apocalyptica and i decided that i want Conclusion to be played at my funeral. I absolutely love that song, and it has a sort of death/goodbye feeling to it. :)
Ummm i think i can positively state that i`m going insane. Not the good sort of insane, this is the bad kind. I had another sort of rejection dealio from the same guy still and i cant take it anymore. I keep breaking down into tears, stare ahead of me, cant possibly concentrate on anything, even my math teacher asked me yesterday what was wrong...guh. I want out of this. Meaning this state of semi depression. I let myself fall for him way to hard, and now i`m suffering the punishment for it. I might just be screwing my life over with this. I have my exams very soon and i cant possibly concentrate, this is NOT good. And today to top this all off i actually started physically feeling sick and weak not just on the inside. *pouts*
I know i desperately NEED to move on/forget about him, cause otherwise something really bad will end up happening. But i dont know how to. I love him so much, i never thought i could ever love anyone this much. And its like ripping my heart in two to know that i`ll never have him...i cant possibly cry anymore, i`ve done sooo much of that in the last little while that i think i`ve ran out of tears. lol
Oh wells...i`ll try and go do some work. Love You all and miss you more than you know it!!!!

Guuuuuuuuuuh! I thought Wednesdays were my sucky days....but appearently today sucks too. I mean i`m sitting here, bawling my eyes out yet again because i`m an idiot who`s hopelessly in love, and who`s again and again rejected. I fuckin` hate myself for getting kicked in the face and then going back again for more, with a smile just to be kicked again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why do i keep hoping??!?! And dont say `cause hope dies last...cause well i fuckin wanted to die now! I`m tired of this bullshit. Why cant i control myself?!?!

P.S.: Nothing actually happened, but thats the whole point....i dont even know what the hell i expected?!

Hey Guys,
Well it seems that i`ve been neglecting LJ world for a while yet again...its not that i dont look at it anymore,its just that i`m either too lazy to write anything, or there is nothing to write about or at least not something that you`d be interested in/i`d wanna post on the internet.
Its my mom`s bday today...so things are kinda hectic, me trying to quickly order a cake/flowers and all these things. lol
I actually had a kind of different/exciting/odd/stupid weekend. lol it brought out a mix of emotions for sure. For starters over the weekend i got like 7-8 hrs of sleep all together, and as you know i`m a sleep-freak and so that kinda put me on the edge, made me hyper at times. lol And well i went clubbing with my friends...and well i drank a bit too much, had some WEIRD experiences. But over all i had a good time, became more confused about some things/some ppl, but its all cool. At least i got to do something different than most days.
i cant believe my bday is like 3 weeks away...i`ll be 19?!??! How did this happen? And more importantly..WHEN?! I mean geez i was only a baby not that long ago, and on most days i for sure dont feel like i`m 19 and certainly dont act like it! You know how silly i get! lol
Its so springy around here, i love it! Its all sunny, and warmish, but not too warm just perfect...the ideal weather. Except i think soon it`ll turn into HOT summer...which i dont like as much....well i like summer just not the hottness of it! Yeah i`m backwards, oh wells.
Well kiddos, as i said i`ve got a ton of things i should be doing, just wanted to let you know that i`m still alive! *grins*
<3
Petra

Your love is... by ChibiMarronchan
Your name is...
Your kiss is...	erotic
Your hugs are...	gentle
Your eyes...	twinkle in the moonlight
Your touch is...	the only thing I desire
Your smell is...	amazing
Your smile is...	hypnotising
Your love is...	everlasting
Quiz created with MemeGen!

LoL amazing...made me laugh for sure!

Love like it's LJ by jain_child
Username
Take your pick:	loving flying falling crashing screaming singing laughing crying running dancing fighting swimming sleeping dreaming
Your rock-steady love	daydemon
You think is hot	tarantismish
You get the money while pretending to love	gordons_glory
How much $?	$954,648
Your current boy/girlfriend	presquile
...who cheats on you with...	mom_fantasies69
The jealous best friend	tolarian
The weird kid in math who wants you in bed	tzatziki_girl
How much love you got?: 33%
Quiz created with MemeGen!

ummm yeah i havent updated in a bit...thats okay i suppose. nothing major has been happening around here. I mean i am either studying/drawing/eating/sleeping....
Manda! Sorry it took me this long to get back to you about this but i kinda just forgot to tell you about it, anyways so a Budapest- Zaegrab (sp?) train ticket one way costs 35.80 €....its more expensive then i thought but not too bad i suppose. :)
so umm hope you`re all good?! the last few days its been sunny and kinda getting a bit warmer...i love it! I dont even care about it being warm but i desperately needed the sunlight!
I gotta run and do the dishes.
Luv Ya!

Alama darlin! Dont make your LJ entries anti-comment plz....i wanted to tell you how proud i am of you getting accepted to the schools you wanna attend!!!!!!!!!!!! Love: your hungarian mom!

Other than that i got hammered down by a cold or a flu or whatever the heck this is...i`ve been down since saturday, and i`m still feeling shitty, hope it`ll pass soon cause i need to get back at focused studying and thats not really happening now. :(
Its NOT spring like at all over here, like we`ve got snow, its relatively cold....i love the snow but i kinda want the spring now without all the lovey dovey couplish side of spring tho! lol i`ll prolly just end up being jealous of the birds, couples, etc. hahaha yeah this is pathetic. Anyways i`m gonna go grab some more tea, cause my throat is killing me.
Lurrrrrrrrrve you!
P.S.: Manda, this time it didnt even last as long as the last time, yeah i`m already talking to him again, i told him EVERYTHING that was bugging me...felt that i could be only his friend, now the whole obsession thing is starting to come back and bite me in the ass. lol Oh wells its my fault, and i keep going back to it...so you know maybe when i go off to uni i`ll get over it/him. Until then i`m trying to be less obsessed, but i cant help it i mean i do love him. :S Yeah i`m an idiot but thats obvious.Love you. *kisses*
P.P.S.: Does anyone know what this whole Europe trip of Ali`s is all about? Is it a school trip? Where did they go? I miss my Ali *pouts*

i hate wednesdays....they ARE no doubt the worst day of the week.
The ONE and ONLY good thing about today is that they let my sister`s fiance out of the hospital!!!!!!!!!
Other than that it sucks ass...major ass at that too.
*pouts*
P.S.: Manda i restarted my not talking to him again....as of Monday night, and it WILL last for a long time now, i`m determined and wanna move on (somehow) Have your fingers crossed so that i dont srew up and give in to my weakness again?! Thanks doll. Cant wait to see you! You`re still coming right???!?!??! lol

P.P.S: I love you all! Miss you!

You know the shakes u get when u drink strong coffee on empty stomach?! Yeah...i`m obviously addicted to coffee and must be an idiot for not eating. lol
Guh i`m procrastinating big time...its so stupid and annoying, but appearently i work better under a lot of pressure of last minutes?! lol yeah as i said idiot.
Love.
P.S.: My sister`s fiance is in hospital and had surgery last night...:S

LAYER ONE: ON THE OUTSIDE
Name: Petra Fejes
Birth date: April 26,1987
Current Location: my lovely bedroom
Eye color: dark brown
Hair Color: dark brownish
Righty or Lefty: Right
Zodiac Sign: Taurus
Favorite music: ummm thats tough...jazz/emo/oldies/etc.
favorite band: right now?! dont really think i have one, i had a really long The Rocket Summer phase...im into Hoollywoodoo a lot right now, its a hungarian weird band i suppose
favorite solo artist:  MIcheal Jackson without a doubt
Least favorite music: rap most likely

LAYER TWO: ON THE INSIDE
Your heritage: hungarian?
Whatt Shoes Did You Wear Today: ummm havent left the house?! so my slippers?!
Your weakness: Food, boys, alcohol, lust/crushes...gots lots of `em
Your fears: being alone/not loved...and not getting into uni of course
Your perfect pizza: ummm the one my mom makes...lots of cheese for sure
Goal you'd like to achieve: get into university!!!!!!!

LAYER THREE: YESTERDAY, TODAY, TOMORROW:
Your most overused phrase: whatever
Your thoughts first waking up: ahh its already morning, i havent finished my dream yet!lol
Your best physical feature: my hair most likely...except its a total mess right now
Your bedtime: whenever...
Your most missed memory: agree with Alaina..the MD hangouts, those were fun! then different ones with different ppl

LAYER FOUR: YOUR PICK:
Pepsi or Coke: neither
McDonald's or Burger King: MCDonalds if i have to choose
Single or group dates: single
Adidas or Nike: i`m not big on labels
Lipton Tea or Nestea: Nestea
Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate
Cappuccino or coffee: coffee by far!! i`m addicted badly

LAYER FIVE: DO YOU?
Smoke: No.
Swear: Yes.
Take a shower: sure do
Have a crush(es): only one...but thats more of an obsession by now (dang it)
Think you've been in love: maybe?!
Liked high school: sure
Want to get married: if i find the right guy...
Believe in yourself: starting to...
Get motion sickness: only very rarely and only in certain situations
Think you're a health freak: Nope that i`m not
Get along with your parents: well i do...cause i know their language but they dont know anything about me, that really trully matters

LAYER SIX: IN THE PAST MONTH
Drank alcohol: umm i think so but only once?!
Gone on a date: nope :(
Gone to the mall: nope...going on Saturday appearently?!
Been on stage: nopes
Eaten Sushi: i`ve only tried it once...so no
Been dumped: No
Gone skating: no dont know how to :(
Gone skinny dippin: Nope
Dyed your hair: Nope

LAYER SEVEN: HAVE YOU EVER
taken off your clothes in a game: prolly
Gotten beaten up: nopes...
Changed who you were to fit in: nopes

LAYER EIGHT: GETTING OLDER
Age you hope to be married: well i dont think i care, as long as its with the perfect guy, if i`d have to say an age...well if by 26ish i`m not married i prolly wont find him...
How do you want to die: peacefully...when i`m old
What country would you most like to visit: umm Canada?!

LAYER NINE: IN A GAL/GUY
Best eye color?: dark
Best hair color?: Dark...prolly dark brown
Short or long hair: shortish
Height: taller than me...not by too too much tho
Best first date location: a club?! lol
Articles of clothing: somehow i have a thing for guys that wear actual shirts with collars and you know the sort of dressy shirt but not really?! lol weird now that i think about it.

LAYER TEN: IN THE NUMBERS
Number of people i can trust: pah...there are a lot of u! lets say 10ish?!
Number of CD's: who knows...dont really listen to them...as i have most of my music on my comp
Number of piercings: earrings?!
Number of tattoos: None
Number of times ur names been in the newspaper: not much...
Number of scars on my body: guh i have one on my knee...no other major ones i dont think

Happy Fuckin` Valentine`s day!
I love you all, but i love you every day, and not a day, minute passes without you in my thoughts and in my heart! Miss You!

i HATE applying to university, its so stressful. eeek. i applied to all architecture and one civil engineering sorta. hope all goes well and i actually get in. lets hope. gotta get some sleep. try to at least.:S

MANDA!!!!!!! I`m over my first 24 hours of not talking to HIM!!!! Arent you proud of me?! Cause i sure am! lol :p
Love you ALL!

Hey guys!
just a quick question, what do u think it means to be in love with someone??!! Like what makes it different from just loving them as a friend?
Yeah i`m obviously not over him, i`m working on it...but i need to know how you`d define that. Please. Otherwise i`m good, i started an architecture type art course on Saturday, i love it. I`m excited for the program and now i need to study my ass off to get in. So have a good day guys! Love You Miss You!